Singles Equality | Singles Bill of Rights

Christina Campbell, August 2026

Hi Copious Readers! This is Christina Campbell, co-founder of one of the original
singles’ advocacy blogs, Onely.org. The Singles Equality board asked me to post my
answers to this NPR survey, which celebrates the rise of solo living and asks listeners
why they choose to be single.

As a longtime advocate for singles’ rights, I feel frustrated when the media talks about
how single dining, travel, and living are suddenly embraced and acceptable. This
acceptance ameliorates socio-cultural prejudices, but not the ingrained institutionalized
“singlism” built into our laws and broader economic policies. That said, if we
disassemble the socio-cultural stigmas against singledom (for example, the lonely solo
diner trope, the crazy cat lady trope, or the irresponsible bachelor trope), then maybe
the entrenched economic, legal, and commercial discrimination against singles will
likewise dissolve. Therefore, I will engage with NPR’s well-intentioned exercise.

These are NPR’s questions:

1. What are the advantages you see about being single? 
2. Are there disadvantages you’ve experienced about being single?
3. Do you date?  If not, why are you not interested in dating?
4. Do you live alone? How does either decision YES or NO impact your life? 
5. What are your favorite solo activities? And what are things you’d rather do with a partner?

Here are my answers. Copious Readers, if you have actively chosen to be single (or if
you’re single by chance), let us know how you would respond to these questions:

1. What are the advantages you see about being single? 
   1. Living alone is a privilege, assuming you have the financial, physical, and cognitive capacity for it. You can control the home decor, the temperature, what pets you have, and how long you wait to clean up hairballs (I recommend allowing the vomit to dry, so the crust flakes easily out of the carpet). You can watch you want on Netflix, at whatever volume, with subtitles in whatever language.
   2. You have the satisfaction of confronting and overcoming life’s logistical problems on your own. If you have a conventional romantic partner(s), it’s easy to allocate specific life tasks to them, and before you know it, you’re broken up (or your partner’s dead) and BAM, you’re left wondering how to calculate estimated taxes and what aisle has that special hot sauce.
   3. When I DO need help with life logistics, I have a wide network of friends and family who provide guidance and cushioning against life’s blows. For me, this is better than having one partner. I can spread my (admittedly myriad) logistical, physical, and emotional needs across different people with different capabilities and wisdoms, rather than dumping all my angst and inexperience on one person’s shoulders.
2. Are there disadvantages you’ve experienced about being single?
   1. Yes! Despite all this talk about the surge in solo travel, solo dining, and solo living, the world is not becoming more singles-friendly in any meaningful way. See my and Onely co-founder Lisa Arnold’s 2013 article in The Atlantic, “The High Price of Being Single in America”.  A single person can easily, easily, easily spend waaaaay over $1 million in her lifetime, compared to her married peer, because of just a few of the 1000+ federal laws that privilege married people.
   2. Since writing that article, I have found many more examples of policies that financially penalize singles. I’ll get into those in a future article. And I’ll also get into discrimination against singles in health care, especially those with chronic health conditions. See the writings of Dr. Joan DelFattore. We’re talking life and death, no exaggeration.
3. Do you date?  If not, why are you not interested in dating?
   1. In my experience and the experience of many of my friends, innumerable men treat women my age as purses or nurses. I already have many fun, loving, and important people in my life whom I want to spend time with, and I feel no need to add a chronic romantic/sexual partner to that mix.
   2. Not to be pedantic (but to be a little pedantic), this question should be rephrased to: “Do you date?” END QUESTION. Why are non-daters required to elaborate on their choice/situation? You would never ask someone, “Do you date? If so, why?” It’s understood by society that dating is already a fine choice, because it is inherently in service of the greater good, meaning: partner- and sex/romance-centered companionship.
4. Do you live alone? How does either decision YES or NO impact your life?
   1. I do live alone, although only because I am lucky enough to be able to afford my own home in northern Virginia, USA. Housing developers the world over, and especially in NoVA, cater to dual-income couples and nuclear families, not to single-income earners. Despite this, I was fortunate to find a condo community containing many other single woman. They support each other and are not restrained by nuclear-normative priorities and parameters.
   2. I ADORE living alone. Every day I am grateful I can afford to do so, financially and physically. I’ve met interesting neighbors, learned a lot about home care, and developed into a skilled interior designer(ish). I don’t have to remind anyone, except myself, to put their shoes in the shoe basket or to turn off lights when they leave a room. When I shuffle through the dark to get my midnight glass of water, I can thud into doors and counter corners with abandon and impunity.
5. Activities: What are your favorite solo activities? And what are things you’d rather do with a partner?
   1. This question is problematic. Why does it create a dichotomy of solo vs partner? Why does it not ask what activities I’d like to do with friends or family?
   2. That said, here are my answers: My favorite solo activities are everything! There’s nothing I don’t mind doing alone: writing in cafes, visiting museums, going to the pool, doing crafts classes, and much more. I’d also be happy to do any of those things with friends. Granted, solo dining can be tricky. I’d like to have a book with me, but to shield myself from boredom, rather than embarrassment.
   3. I can’t think of any recreational activities for which I’d particularly need or want a conventional romantic partner.

Copious Readers, let us know how you would answer the above questions!

–Christina Campbell